Identifying Bullies & Victims

Bullies can best be defined by their personality style. Researchers describe bullies as:

• Enjoying aggression and the rewards gained from aggressive acts;
• Lacking empathy for their victim;
• Lacking guilt for their actions;
• Dominating and like to be in charge;
• Having aggressive role models; and
• Thinking unrealistically about how the world should meet their needs.

There are two types of victims: passive victims and provocative victims. Passive victims generally do not defend themselves and can be characterized by:

• Being isolated during the school day;
• Lacking social skills;
• Being physically weak;
• Crying or yielding easily to bullies;
• Suffering from past trauma; and/or
• Having learning difficulties.

Provocative victims generally tease and provoke bullies, but do not have the social or physical skills necessary to defend themselves. Provocative victims can be characterized by:

• Being easy to arouse emotionally;
• Behaving in a manner that maintains the conflict; and/or
• Possibly having attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

Children who are being bullied may likely:

• Have torn, damaged or missing pieces of clothing, books or other belongings;
• Have unexplained cuts, bruises or scratches from fighting;
• Have few, if any, friends with whom he or she spends time;
• Seem afraid of going to school, walking to and from school, riding the school bus, or taking part in organized activities with peers;
• Lose interest in school work or suddenly begin to do poorly; and/or
• Complain frequently of headaches, stomach aches or other physical problems.